Near Death

I have few recollections of what occurred at the time of the crash, and recall little of the days immediately following it. What follows then is the best I can do describing my crash of April 14th, 2024, and lengthy (ongoing) recovery. I did my final monthly update on December 31st, 8.5 months after the crash. The only other update I may consider is a summary when I either return to work or retire.

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Note: I would have preferred to write this some time ago, but I could only type well enough as of August 6th (when I published the first part of this), barely, to do so. If nothing else, the typing and the thinking have both been excellent therapy.

The Accident

I went out for a bit of a joyride on the afternoon of Sunday, April 14th. I usually head out for an hour or two and do 30-60km on these types of rides. Beyond that it was a pretty unremarkable day – clear and cool for spring in Vancouver.

Just past Boundary Road, I was heading east on Rumble Street in southwest Burnaby, crossing Joffre, when a car turned left across my path, slamming into me at what seemed like it must have been 40-50 km/hr. In my reading of the surgery notes from hospital, they estimated the car was going about 50km/hr from the force of the impact. Regardless, it was fast enough to throw me into the windshield of the car, and up over the roof of the vehicle according to the police report. I landed on the pavement about 10-15 feet behind it. I remember the other vehicle coming to a stop diagonally, sort of pointing away from me.

The only thing I can recall from the impact is the driver exclaiming repeatedly that he never saw me – on an absolutely clear day with excellent visibility. And before anyone assumes anything, I was wearing a white helmet, dressed in a very visible bright red cycling jersey. Apparently I never fully lost consciousness, but absolutely everything from that moment until days later in Royal Columbian Hospital is a blur. I know I was awake at times, but I wouldn’t really say I was “conscious” until several days after the crash.

Somehow, I managed to provide my wife’s cell number to a bystander, who called, and followed that up with a text message when she couldn’t reach my wife. In a strange turn of events, the bystander also provided contact info for the driver. Thinking he was a witness, my wife sent him a text asking what he saw, to which he responded that he was actually the driver who hit me. Given BC’s no-fault driver insurance, this hardly matters, as he’ll likely suffer not so much as a reprimand for his careless driving.

I spent three weeks in Royal Columbian Hospital, before being transferred for another five, to GF Strong, a rehab hospital that specializes in Spinal Cord and Traumatic Brain Injuries (more on that shortly). In total I spent eight weeks in hospital.

My wife visited me at both hospitals every day and the kids as much as their schedules would allow. What I’m about to describe in The Injuries section below gave them all a good scare, and in some ways, particularly the first days were probably as hard, if not worse, for them than they were for me. I wasn’t exactly cognizant of much going on.

The Injuries

Note: This section has obviously had significant contributions from my wife, since I have zero recollection of anything from surgery, ICU or the first week in hospital.

You’ll have to bear with me through this section. My injury list was serious and extensive. I’m also going to try to describe things below in roughly the order they happened.

Stop the Bleeding

When I arrived at Royal Columbian Emergency I had a lot of internal and external bleeding. The most obvious injuries were a massive gash just below my left elbow and additional gashes at my outer left knee and on my outer left thigh. I have scars from all of them, but the real souvenir is about five inches long, extending down my left forearm from my elbow. However, it was all the internal damage that would come to dominate everything that followed.

Non-responsive

Once they finished stitching up my wounds, apparently I had become non-responsive. This was when they suspected I’d had one or more strokes. Neurology became involved at this point and, while not even my wife knew at the time, they must have done some imaging, as these pictures were referred to during an ophthalmology follow-up I had on August 2.

Catheter Embolism

Once they stitched up my external damage, they needed to do something called a catheter embolism. In spite of its scary sounding name, Google says it’s a “minimally invasive” procedure to stop bleeding.

Carotid Artery Stent

After the embolism, the neurologist’s recommendation was to put a stent in my right Carotid artery (which was apparently in much worse shape than my left). The reasoning was two-fold. Not only would it ensure enough blood and oxygen would get to my brain, but the chances of blood clots would be reduced. They were openly wondering whether my brain would get enough oxygen to prevent me suffering permanent damage. I guess it did, though my wife has probably always suspected my brain is a little oxygen-deficient. At one point in those first days they were planning to stent the other Carotid, but at the time, felt I wasn’t stable enough.

Bowels, Spleen and Diaphragm

Which came first, the bowels or the spleen? Actually, I’m only half kidding. I returned to general surgery with my bowels and in my chest cavity and my spleen an unsalvageable mess. Yes, you read that right – in my chest cavity. The force of the accident had jammed my bowels up into a place they weren’t supposed to be, and my spleen was too badly damaged to be saved. The surgeon originally thought they may have to take out sections of my bowels, but apparently found them to be in one piece, more or less, and manageable.

My diaphragm was also ruptured and needed repair. The surgeon was hoping it could be “coaxed” back down to where it belonged, but ultimately it required surgical intervention.

Multiple Fractured Ribs

I have no idea how many exactly, but I broke several ribs and, honestly, they ended up the least of my concerns. During my recuperation, I really didn’t sneeze or cough much and aside from some slight stiffness I barely noticed them. If only everything could have been that easy. I was, of course, on heavy pain meds in the hospital, so that may have something to do with it.

The Impacts

Strokes

By far the strokes (yes, I had more than one) have had the largest impact on my life. They have affected my cognitive skills, memory, reading, writing, typing, vision, and my right hand. Somewhat miraculously, I suffered no lower body injuries, save for the gashes, but the strokes made my right hand uncoordinated and slow. This necessitated a couple months of extensive hand therapy. It could best be described as a near-useless appendage upon my release from hospital, but has thankfully shown remarkable improvement, to the point where I’ve regained probably 80-90% (as of December 31st) of pre-crash functioning, perhaps 75% where drumming, typing and writing is concerned.

Memory and cognition is, and shall remain for some time, a work-in-progress. When first released from hospital, I constantly forgot where I put things and misremembered details of almost everything. I couldn’t really read or even just parse the hands on a clock face very well, and I became confused easily. I’m happy to say this has improved significantly as well. I am, however, a ways yet from being fully recovered cognitively, and frankly may never be. The complex planning I used to do without so much as a thought isn’t ready for a return to work. In fact, while UX design and user testing used to form the bulk of my job, as a Scrum Master with UX responsibilities, planning now constitutes the majority of my work. If I had to put a percentage on my return to pre-crash cognitive skills, I’d say I’m at perhaps 65%.

Back in the early days of Royal Columbian, my wife says I was limited to one-word responses and most often stared off into space, so there’s clearly been lots of improvement on that front, too. I also had problems with things like labelling, categorization and word finding, often stumbling for terms that came easily to me before the crash. I had a speech therapy assessment in two sessions, on July 12th and 19th, and began 13 sessions on September 3rd.

So, while the cognitive domain is a bit of a mixed bag, in truth to look at me physically, you wouldn’t know I’ve had “polytrauma.” My cognitive therapist has been working with me to improve executive functioning and things like complex and abstract planning. As of December 31st, I’ve finished the first block of sessions (with a reassessment and new block of sessions coming, and I’ve been very impressed with her approach. I expect to have another three months of cognitive therapy approved and we’ll be switching gears in the new year to more real-world return-to-work prep exercises. This should take me to the end of March, when I expect to begin actual graduated return-to-work planning (if that comes to pass), and be done with all therapies.

As a result of losing my spleen, the other major impact on me is that of becoming immunocompromised. I’ve had five new vaccines as a result, with two of them requiring two doses at least two months apart, then either being finished completely or requiring boosters every five years. And, while we have always taken our COVID and flu vaccines enthusiastically, missing them now isn’t remotely an option. Thankfully, beyond that, and ensuring I do my best to avoid infections, I can proceed with my life fairly normally. I often find myself wondering what my risk of developing an infection in any given situation is, but this really isn’t a context where rigid percentages can be applied. At least most of the immune system functions previously provided by the spleen are then handled by other organs, notably the liver and kidneys.

Reticent Right Hand

I can’t really separate the right hand functioning from the stroke, as they go hand-in-hand (pun intended). This has largely been a slow, steady climb to regaining as much function as I can. It’s gone very well, but like everything, progress has been measured in weeks and months, and not days. As of December 31st, I’m 8.5 months past the crash and only now are the drumming, printing and typing all becoming “passable,” but given their dependency on fine motor skills, still not near 100%. Daily tasks and general right hand use, though, is largely indistinguishable from before the crash.

My wife says that in the very early days of my hospitalization, I had a lot of right and lower limb swelling, so I’m exceedingly thankful for how much things have improved on that front. When it comes to returning to work, obviously I can’t separate the cognitive skills from the motor skills, and the former has a ways to go before I’d be comfortable doing so.

Visual fatigue, Light Sensitivity and Brain Fog

I lump all these together because the boundaries of any of them blend seamlessly into each other. The biggest issue by far is the fog, which can most accurately be described as a very mild hangover, minus the headache. I’m also sensitive to bright sunlight and the white glare of overcast days. Finally, I have generalized visual fatigue, causing me to easily tire mentally. It’s all improved a lot since I left GF Strong, as I couldn’t tolerate more than 30-60 minutes of screen time at a stretch and now I’m up to about 3-4 hours. The real test, I expect, will be to combine more cognitively taxing exercises with extended screen time and seeing how it goes. All I can say is, stay tuned. In closing, physically I could return to work tomorrow. Cognitively, not so much.

The other thing that the fog and visual fatigue also triggers is vestibular symptoms. Steady improvement on that front is offset by the fact that returning to running has been a slow proposition. As of 8.5 months post-crash, I’ve managed 13k at a 5:15-ish pace so far, and have been as fast as a 4:40 pace on shorter efforts of up to 5k. I am seeing light at the end of the tunnel, with less fatigue and fewer vestibular symptoms all the time. The cycling is improving a bit faster than the running, and both of which, like the right hand and cognitive functioning, are also measured in weeks and months as opposed to days. I’m doing both e-bike and trainer rides right now and managing substantial trainer sessions at continually increasing power outputs. With lingering minor symptoms I hesitate to say I’m fully recovered physically, but I’m very close, and doing most physical things almost as well as I did before the crash.

The most noticeable difference is that I need to do everything with far more intention and attention now. Whether it’s where I place my foot plant and watching for tripping / ankle-turning hazards when running, or slowing down and double / triple checking at corners when I’m riding, I take far more care with everything. And, frankly, being more intentional isn’t remotely a bad thing. I guess it’s simply a matter of living more presently than I did before the crash.

Tubes and (more) Scars

It’s probably worth mentioning at this point that I was also intubated for breathing, had a PICC line so the multiple needles I got were easier to handle, had chest and stomach tubes to drain blood, had a feeding tube to get calories into me (I dropped about 30lbs at my skinniest point), and even had a catheter for, well, you know …

In addition to the scars I’ve already mentioned, I’ve got about a foot long beauty running the length of my abdomen, another that meets that one, perpendicular to it and a little 2″ one on my ribs, under my arm. Apparently diaphragm, bowel and splenectomy surgery is hard to do neatly. The thing about big cuts and organ removal is that they can cause some mild loss of sensation. There’s a good chance it will return, but a very small area in my left pectoral and under my arm has experienced this.

I think I actually count five scars on my torso … I guess the photo to the left / above isn’t as bad as it could be, anyway.

August Update

Bike Damage Claim Settled

I go into a fair bit more detail in the addendum about ICBC’s enhanced Care model, but in early August, after a mere five months, my bike and carbon wheel write-off claim was finally settled. It was endlessly frustrating to be repeatedly ghosted by the adjuster, with zero apologies for doing so, but at least I got the money and it was a better offer than expected.

No More Hand Therapy

This change had been coming for a while, as I was plateauing with the therapy while the hand continued to progress. Really, if you’re doing the work and still seeing improvement, there isn’t a lot more the therapist can do. Using the hand continually for nearly everything (as I have done) has really been the best therapy. I thank my lucky stars I’m a drummer because I’m convinced that nothing is better hand therapy.

Running and Cycling For Recovery

There’s a litany of data supporting the benefits of cardiovascular exercise on recovering from an acquired/traumatic brain injury. People recover faster and show more improvement in their cognitive functioning overall. It’s been slow going, but my vestibular symptoms were also lessening more as time went on. In August I still experienced the brain “fog” but the dizziness and balance issues were less intense than when I came home from GF Strong.

In August I also decided to do my best to do a run, e-bike or trainer ride almost every day going forward. I obviously wasn’t training for anything, but I figured the only way I could continue to reduce my vestibular symptoms as fast as possible was to desensitize myself by triggering them. By August I was doing runs of 8k or so, so working toward longer continuous runs became one of my goals going forward.

In August my trainer rides were mostly clocking in at up to 60 minutes, and regaining more of my power output became my other goal for my physical recovery.

When I first came home from GF Strong I had to pause and rest just going up the stairs and by August I was doing decent rides and runs. So, with both, I switched gears from just doing the activities to improving upon key metrics.

Long-term Disability Approved

By far the best news in August was that my LTD claim was approved when we had our Manulife phone interview. In general, the entire Manulife LTD application process was pretty painless. As of year’s end I’m still not sure whether there’s a return to work in my future or not, but the focus has always been to get back to a place where I could return to my job. That’s also been my approach with all therapy since day 1 – returning to something like normalcy. Right now, with the aforementioned cognitive deficits, and some of my remaining vestibular triggers, and the light sensitivity and visual fatigue … all would hinder my ability to work a full day. One thing I had already decided by August is that any return to work would have to be 100% remote or it wasn’t happening. My employer has accommodated other immunocompromised people so I don’t think this should be a showstopper.

Fitness – August 2024

If nothing else, very early in my therapy at GF Strong I decided I wouldn’t fail at progress because I didn’t put in the effort. The list below also doesn’t include my therapies or homework, which probably averaged about an an hour a day by August. When I first began my hand and vestibular physiotherapy, it was common for me to spend 3+ hours a day on my therapies and related homework.

  • Run: 33km
  • Walk: 50km
  • Cycling (trainer & e-bike): 178km
  • Weights: 4.5 hrs
  • Yoga: 4.5 hrs
  • Drums: 9 hrs

September Update

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Victoria

For the first time since my crash, we got back to Victoria from September 17-20. It wasn’t quite the same without craft beer or whisky (I’m mostly abstaining for a year post-crash), but it was still very enjoyable. Connie was nursing a calf/outer knee strain, so we couldn’t do the walking we typically love to do while there. I did have my fastest short run since the crash (4.5k @ 5:15/km) so that’s something I guess. Wild to think that as recently as June I was struggling to do a shaky, slow 3k, and by September, 9-10k was reasonably easy, all things considered.

Weights

Early in the month I decided I didn’t really like going to the weight room to do my strength workouts with me missing my spleen and all, and given my need to keep building strength, I asked my OT if it would be possible to get some weights for home. Much to my surprise, it was approved by ICBC and I felt much more comfortable not exposing myself to the viral stew at the gym.

New Bike Choices

After finally getting my bike money from ICBC in August, I began shopping for a replacement steed in September. I’ve been taking my time because I want to be sure I won’t switch to more transport and city biking. If I don’t feel I need a road machine any longer it’ll reduce my cost by half or more. I think I’ll ultimately still want to do group road rides, but it’s best to be sure and not regret my purchase immediately after making it. Honestly, just being able to return to a cycling club and ride is something I wondered if I’d ever be able to do again.

Fitness – September 2024

In September I tried to get still more regimented with my fitness and saw pretty significant increases in time/distance across the board. While I’m still not beating myself up for missing workouts, I decided I needed to do my best to stick to a schedule and it paid off in September. I began to set modest time or distance goals for all major activity types to see how well I could do in the coming weeks and months.

I continued to see improvement in my strength, coordination and general right hand functioning too. Typing and writing were still a bit slow, but also improved a lot in September. Drumming surprisingly improved the most, and as of December 31st, is seeing less dramatic improvement, but still improving, nonetheless. I walked a lot in Victoria in September, so that was more a blip than actual progress, but walking a lot is thankfully not an issue. Cycling on the trainer also saw glimpses of power returning. I’d say September was sort of a milestone month, as it felt like everything really began turning a corner.

  • Running: 55 km
  • Walking: 92 km
  • Cycling (trainer & e-bike): 233 km
  • Weights: 6.75 hrs
  • Yoga: 6.2 hrs
  • Drums: 7.5hrs

Notes

  • I haven’t mentioned it so far, but one thing I have struggled with since the crash is keeping up my weight. I used to hold steady at about 165, which was probably ten pounds heavier than I’d have liked. Now I usually weigh 148-150. In a perfect world I’d weigh around 155. I’ve taken to smaller, more frequent meals because my appetite has been smaller since my hospital stay, with all the abdominal and chest related surgeries, and eating denser, more high calorie foods often comes with additional salt, sugar, cholesterol or a combination of them. Hopefully I’ll gain that final 5-7 pounds at some point.
  • I also have slightly elevated BP now, but really have been dealing with it for a few years, but the medication I’m taking for it (Amlodipine) seems to cause constipation. I tried a few things without much success and finally gave in to Metamucil in the past week, and that seems to have done the trick. I’m very regular now and much happier. We already eat a pretty high fibre diet, so I figured I didn’t need it, but I’m glad I tried it. Unlike polyethylene glycol, I can use it daily, with the added benefits of potentially helping to regulate blood sugar, blood pressure and LDL cholesterol. Man, does all this stuff make me sound old now.

October Update

Vaccines Done

Well, for another five years, anyway. Losing your spleen not only means trying to be more careful about infections and taking precautions like masking in crowded spaces, but also getting a whole whack of new vaccines, almost all of which are to prevent encapsulated bacterial infections:

  • Bexsero x1
  • Hib x1
  • Prevnar 20 x1
  • COVID/Flu (annually)
  • Nimenrix x2 (eight weeks apart)
  • Shingrix x2 (2-6 months apart)

Vestibular Physio Done

In truth, this is a massive list item checked. I needed a couple months of hand therapy to get my right hand well on the road to recovery. However, I needed much more therapy to right the running ship. I’d had just over six months of vestibular physio by the end of October. My only goals have always been a return to running and cycling. For some time, I had no idea what that looked like or how far I would get. Turns out, pretty far, with no real ceiling, aside from whatever natural ability I have (and sadly the inexorable effect of Father Time).

In October I finally cracked 10k running, and began to feel like a half marathon again (just slower) was probably within reach. As well, I was regularly doing substantial trainer rides of more than an hour, and beginning to rebuild the top end of my power by grinding out harder workouts. While I will probably be fighting minor balance issues while running for a long time, and remaining more careful with foot placement, I got to a pretty good place with the run/bike. I honestly thought my running days might be done with how I felt a few months ago. I’m still very cautious riding my e-bike and feeling comfortable on the road may always be a struggle, but the one thing I have decided is that I’ll never ride solo on the open road again. I’ll ride solo on side streets or separated infrastructure only, and only ride on the open road in a group.

Return to Work?

This idea is nowhere near firm yet. However, it’s certainly a consideration. Until near the end of October I’d been almost positive I would simply retire at some point in the next year or so, but I have a morbid curiosity about how well I could do my job again and began thinking of it as the last big step in my recovery.

There are several things to consider before actually taking the big step of returning to work (or full retirement), and it will all hinge on, not only, how my cognitive therapy continues to progress, but also a graduated return to work and 100% remote work accommodation. I will never step foot in an office again, now that I’m missing my spleen.

Fitness – October 2024

In October, I still increased my time or mileage over September in most categories, but not as dramatically month over month as I did through September.

Total (walk, bike, run) Mileage: 414.7 km

  • Running: 53.0 km
  • Walking: 53.6 km
  • Cycling (trainer, e-bike): 308.1 km
  • Weights: 7h 58m
  • Yoga: 5 h 38m
  • Drums: 7 h 2m

Notes

  • After struggling to put on weight since my eight week hospital stay, I’ve held pretty steady at about 150 lbs for the past month or so, just shy of my 155 goal weight.
  • Just a word about disability insurance … While the general administrative stuff can be a hassle, and weaving your way through the application processes can be frustrating, I’m now receiving 90% of my net salary, and very thankful for that. It provides significant security and peace of mind when recovering as fully as possible should be your only concern. I have more thoughts about ICBC’s enhanced care model, and disability / income replacement insurance below.

November Update

November’s update is both very significant and pretty short. The big news is that, five years after last living in Victoria, we moved back in mid-November. I’m sure I’ll have more to say on the subject eventually, but in short, we signed a lease on November 4th, effective for November 15th, and I. Could. Not. Be. Happier. We’ve been wanting to get back since we last lived here in 2019, but expected to have to wait until we fully retired. I guess if one positive came out of my crash, it was this, and deciding I will no longer put off until tomorrow what I want to do today. Nearly dying does give you some perspective.

A Letter for a Careless Driver

The other somewhat major development is that, after careful consideration, and vacillating repeatedly, I decided late in November to send the driver who hit me a letter outlining the impact his carelessness has had on me. Drafting it it has been very therapeutic. As I said, my wife inadvertently got his contact info, so we were able to determine that his home-based business was a couple blocks from where he hit me. I don’t want a response; only to hope that he reads it and pays more attention to his surroundings when driving. Sending it will, of course, have to wait until the Canada Post strike is over.

Thanks also to my cognitive therapist, Kathy, for feedback on the following.

Re: April 14th, 2024

I’m the guy you hit  on April 14th. Since you said to my wife by text that you hoped I would recover fully, I thought I’d let you know what kind of damage even momentary inattentiveness can cause. My injuries were extensive and severe.

Physically, I came into Royal Columbian Emergency with significant lacerations down my left arm and on my left thigh and knee, and multiple fractured ribs. The force of the crash jammed my bowels up into my chest cavity and also resulted in me losing my spleen and rupturing my diaphragm. They had to put a stent in my right carotid artery for fear of enough oxygen getting to my brain, as I had become unresponsive shortly after arriving at RCH. As a result of the splenectomy alone, I am now permanently immunocompromised, which meant five new vaccines, boosters for two of them in five years, and being up to date on annual COVID and flu shots. More significantly, I can no longer safely go to concerts, hockey games or anywhere people are crowded into smaller spaces, including even just a bite out at a busy restaurant. This poses significant challenges for attending my son’s wedding next year. In short I am at a substantially higher risk of contracting infections than I was before the crash. I also have several disfiguring scars as a result. One the length of my abdomen, another about 4” long, perpendicular to that one (from the splenectomy, with a corresponding abdominal bulge), and more down my left forearm, on my knee and thigh, and several small scars from the feeding, drainage and intubation tubes. Beyond the scarring, the other effect has been a loss of sensation under my left arm and in my pectoral muscle. It’s unclear right now whether the feeling will return.

With regard to the bulge, it appears to be a small hernia, which will almost certainly require another surgery and the risk of further numbness in my chest/abdomen to repair.

I spent three weeks in Royal Columbian and was transferred to GF Strong for another five, which included starting very intense therapy and rehab.

Less obvious but far more significant … I suffered several small strokes (I am not someone normally at high risk of stroke) resulting in a traumatic brain injury which, in turn, affected my right arm and hand motor skills and coordination. It is getting better but may never fully recover. I also had visual deficits when first released from hospital (which have thankfully mostly resolved aside from the visual fatigue I refer to below). Similarly, I developed significant cognitive issues as a result of the brain injury. Memory, executive functioning, recall and many other issues have prevented me returning to work, which frankly, may never happen. I now also have severe light sensitivity, visual and mental fatigue and a persistent “brain fog” which may never lift.The brain injury has also caused significant vestibular (balance, dizziness, etc) symptoms, which have drastically affected my running and to a lesser degree, my cycling (both things I am passionate about). I also am much more paranoid of traffic in general and doubt I’ll ever ride solo in traffic again - something I used to really enjoy doing.

I have just finished six months of vestibular physiotherapy, had two months of hand therapy after I left GF Strong and will be in cognitive therapy for several more months. I am not carrying around anger because it wouldn’t be productive, wouldn’t change anything and wouldn’t help my continuing recovery. I will just mention though, if it isn’t clear by implication, the crash has permanently and significantly impacted my life, and aside from your premiums paying for my recovery, I suspect you’ve suffered no other financial costs. FYI, if we weren’t subject to no-fault insurance in BC you would have been liable for damages, and it would have cost you significantly more than higher insurance premiums. However, only crashes involving alcohol, road rage or distracted driving are typically subject to any further investigation or possible charges (and the police file offered no help). I remember you saying you didn’t see me (my ONLY recollection of anything for about  a week). It was a very clear day and I was dressed very visibly, so I often wonder if you were distracted, because you certainly weren’t paying enough attention to be driving. 

All of this doesn’t even touch on the stress and uncertainty you caused my wife and sons, who didn’t know if I would even survive, or, if so, if I would have permanent brain damage or possibly be blind (all things that were openly discussed in the first days after the crash). It also doesn’t touch on navigating the endless bureaucracy associated with income replacement insurance. Presently I have to deal with three different insurers (EI, ICBC and my LTD provider).

It has been over eight months since my life was altered permanently from the crash with you. According to estimates from the hospital and police, you were doing about 50 km\hr at the time of impact, when, in my opinion, you should have been going much slower in that area. However, it’s a pretty well established pattern that people pay less attention the closer they are to home, when driving. I don’t want your sympathy and have purposely not included my address or name, because I don’t want any kind of reply. However, if I have one thing to say in closing it’s to please, PLEASE slow down, and pay attention. I nearly died because you weren’t doing so on April 14th.

Fitness – November 2024

Almost entirely due to the move, progress on my fitness took a major hit, and was down 58% from October. I expect December to see a nice rebound across the board.

  • Total (walk, bike, run) Mileage: 173.2 km
  • Running: 19.6 km
  • Walking: 82.7 km
  • Cycling (trainer, e-bike): 71.9 km
  • Weights: 2h 38m
  • Yoga: 4h 40m
  • Drums: 1h 2m

Notes

  • Our move ended up being quite the adventure with ferry delays, and heat / hot water issues, but that’s all been rectified (hopefully) and feels like another post for another day.

December Update

I’ve decided that this will be my last monthly update, with the possible exception of a summation when I either return to work or retire. My progress still continues to be good, but true milestones are fewer and further between.

Regardless of what ends up happening, I continue preparing as though I will return to work. To that end, I am still in cognitive therapy for a few more months at the very least, with short-term memory, planning and problem solving getting better, little by little, and, while not quite there yet, typing has improved to the point where it will be slow but is bordering on acceptable for work.

I’m not sure if it’s a case of fatigue with needing to constantly prove that I am not ready for work / disabled, needing to continually provide related documentation, or just the fact I’m dealing with three different insurers, all with their similar but different requirements, but both my wife and I have noticed my frustration level is much higher with things that didn’t trigger me before. To deal with it, I’ve asked my OT and cognitive therapist to include “frustration strategies” with the general return to work stuff. It’s not fair to my wife to have to put up with my kvetching, so I’m looking to make sure it doesn’t become more of an issue than it is.

We’re on Christmas break over the holidays, but will reconvene in the new year with a focus on things that will hopefully prepare me for a real-world work situation and head off the aforementioned frustrations. We’ll file all of that under “to be determined” for now.

I still haven’t bought a new road bike, as right now in the midst of “wet coast winter,” being on the trainer or e-bike is completely sufficient for my needs, though I do plan to join a cycling club again … I think. Power output and ride speed on the trainer continues to inch upward and is getting close to where I was pre-crash.

Running continues to progress well; amazingly well really. I’m closing in on a 4:30/km pace on shorter, harder efforts and usually 5:15-5:30/km on longer, easier efforts. These paces are, more or less, what I was running before the crash. Now I will begin edging my longer runs beyond 13k, my current limit, to see how far I can get. It’s nice that I feel like going longer won’t be a problem. I’m even considering doing the Oak Bay half marathon in the spring, but we’ll see. I feel like a training goal would be a good thing for motivation and continued progress, even if I don’t do the race.

I sent the letter I posted above to the driver who hit me, once the Canada Post strike ended in mid-December. Doing so was therapeutic and provided some measure of closure, though I’m not even sure what constitutes closure. I’m not mad, and in truth there’s little that can be done when someone drives carelessly, aside from hoping they slow down and pay more attention in future.

I guess the only real development for me physically in the past couple months, aside from continued improvement with running and cycling, is that of an abdominal incisional hernia. At first I thought my incision was just healing a bit oddly, but it seems that the small bulge in my abdominal wall is actually a hernia. There’s no pain at all, and short of being aware of it, it causes no issues right now. I’ve been referred to a surgeon in Victoria by one of the surgeons who did my original emergency splenectomy and diaphragm repair. It’ll be at least 12 months before I can actually get a consult with the surgeon here, so aside from watching for signs of strangulation / prolapse, there’s little to do but wait. It’s typically over 30 months to get a hernia repaired in BC, so wait, indeed.

Fitness Totals for 2024

Since I got back on track with my fitness in December, more or less, I thought it might be better to review the entire year, in light of the impact the crash has had on my ability to exercise.

  • Total: 998 activities, 5380 km, 532 hrs
  • Running: 81 activities, 385 km, 35 hrs
  • Walking: 386 activities, 640 km, 143 hrs
  • Cycling (trainer, e-bike, road): 234 activities, 4355 km, 121 hrs
  • Strength: 71 activities, 46 hrs
  • Yoga: 113 activities, 51 hrs
  • Drums: 184 activities, 97 hrs

All things considered, my activity log doesn’t look all that bad. Monthly, I averaged 489kms overall and 5.4kms per activity, 32kms of running (the hardest activity to return to by far), 53kms of walking and 363 kms of cycling (of all kinds) for the year. When you consider that I couldn’t do any activities at all for two months, I should actually be averaging things over ten months.

As well, I’d say strength took the longest to return to (losing 30lbs makes one pretty weak) so averaging about 4 hrs per month isn’t too bad, as it ramped way up in the final months of the year. I also averaged 4.25 hrs of yoga and over 8 hrs of drumming a month; also good when you consider two months was a complete write-off. This year hasn’t remotely been about how much I could do, and entirely about just doing it.

Finally, it wouldn’t be a final update to this fiasco without expressing my profound thanks to many people:

  • First and foremost, my wife Connie, who has been an absolute rock star throughout. I know dealing with this and some of the illogical frustrations and flat out weird shit I’ve said and done through my recovery and rehab hasn’t been easy. She has more grace than I have a right to experience and I couldn’t love a person more.
  • My kids and soon-to-be daughter-in-law, who routinely kept my spirits up and put up with my many updates and cycling/running and other milestones, in spite of having no personal interest in the subject 🙂 I love you all.
  • My extended family and old friends, including well wishes from far and wide, and most welcome visits from a couple cousins from Ontario and my oldest friend Andy (53 years and counting). I’m happy to say that I surprised all of them with my progress (Given the severity of my crash, I know their expectations were probably pretty low).
  • My Vancouver friends who routinely grabbed coffee and hung out with me.
  • Finally, in Royal Columbian Hospital, GF Strong and the community, the many doctors and surgeons who performed minor miracles saving my life and the many therapists who have put me on the road to a very solid recovery, I literally would not be here without them.

Notes

  • In summation, my recovery progress has been very good to, honestly, outstanding. As of the end of 2024 my fitness is mostly where it was before the crash, with a few lingering vestibular symptoms, and residual minor brain fog and visual fatigue thrown in to keep things interesting.
  • Cognitively, I have made huge improvements since I came home from the hospital, but am still a few months from testing the waters of a return to work, as planning, problem solving and overall executive functioning still need additional therapy, and I still experience at times, significant levels of frustration with things that wouldn’t have bothered me nearly as much before the crash. True multitasking still presents some challenges for me.
  • While I ponder a return to work, a graduated return and 100% remote accommodation will be mandatory for me and, if that or continued progress with cognitive therapy stalls anywhere close to where I am now, I am pretty comfortable considering full retirement.
  • If we can comfortably qualify for a mortgage this year, I suspect retirement becomes more attractive still, as the motivation to work again after a year or more off work, and turning 61 in October 2025, likely wanes completely.

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